Being a parent of a young musician can be pretty daunting, especially if you never played an instrument yourself (or worse still, had a bad experience learning!). So, here are some thoughts on how to make the most of the experience:
Practice
This is the biggie. No-one wants to get to the situation where you feel you have to nag them to practice, and they resent it and lose interest. Yet it is vital to progressing, and building new skills and knowledge.
Firstly, a clear understanding of how learning takes place is really important for both of you. Watch this video together. It explains a great deal.
So, short regular practice sessions are key. It only has to be 5-10 minutes, but it has to have a good level of focus. Ideally every day, but realistically I am okay with 4-5 sessions a week in addition to band and lessons.
I will send students home with a practice diary to fill in, along with a ‘practice contract’ – an agreed plan, signed by student and parent, of when practice will take place on a regular basis (i.e. straight after school on monday, before dinner on tuesday, after soccer on wednesday etc). If a session is missed here or there that is ok, but generally establishing a good routine is really helpful. Simple is good – for example, every day just before dinner.
Another really useful tip is to make practice as easy as possible. Where practical, leaving the instrument accessible and (safely) out of its case, or sitting in an open case, makes it mentally easier to practice. If the student has to get their instrument, go to the other end of the house, unpack it, go and find their music etc, then practising seems like a much bigger deal.
They might be a bit lost for the first little while. They should have a specific lesson they are working on. Going slowly and learning to recognise the notes is super important. You could sit with them and help them work out which note to play, which valves to press down or where to move the slide. Or, just ask them to play you something they are working on. Pick a piece from the page and say you’ll be back in 10 minutes to listen to it.
Rewards
The long term goal is intrinsic rewards – the warm fuzzy feeling you get when something goes well. But in the short term, extrinsic rewards are just fine with me. For example, after their first band concert they can choose where to go for dinner, or a movie or something. Or, if they practice every day for a week they can have a chocolate frog. Anything that gets the instrument on their face on a regular basis, especially in the first two terms.
Music Literacy
The music lessons are designed so that everyone can learn, regardless of whether you have read music before. We don’t move very fast either. But, without home practice it can be possible for students to fall behind. We learn one note in the first week, two more in the second, then slowly add more notes. If they don’t learn the first three, then when we add new notes it just gets more and more confusing.
If, with a reasonable amount of practice, they still aren’t getting the reading, I have some techniques that can help. But it is important you approach me early, don’t wait too long. I have some flashcards that can aid practice. The following video can help too. You could even watch it with them before the first lesson.
Rhythm is a separate concept, better described in the next video (though it uses some slightly different names for the note values).
“Chops”
The way the lips are set for playing is called the embouchure, or “chops”. This refers to the muscle control required by the player to change notes, or to produce the higher or lower notes. This can take some time to develop. Everyone can move their lips, but to trick the lips into doing the exact position you need for different notes takes patience and practice. Some people just ‘get it’. Some have to work to develop it. But, along with music literacy, having issues with your embouchure development can be a real (pardon the pun) buzzkill for a kid.
The main things to understand with the lips are:
- high notes require tighter lips and faster air
- lower notes require looser lips and slower air
The buzz is created not by forcing air through closed lips, rather by allowing the lips to vibrate on a stream of air already passing through them. The size of the opening at the lips helps speed up or slow down the air, together with changes in air pressure from the lungs.
The most common problem I see is students trying to force air through closed lips. This way it feels to them like they are blowing really hard, but actually they are pushing hard from their lungs, but simultaneously stopping the air with their throat and lips, causing tremendous pressure in the throat. It should feel more like they are blowing air through a drinking straw, then the lips buzz on that air.
Other ideas
The main thing is to be generally supportive. Give loads of praise for effort. For instance, rather than just saying “that sounds great”, consider “that sounds great; you must have worked really hard on that.”
It is particularly good to encourage curiosity. I am happy to write out songs that they are keen to learn – favourite TV themes, footy songs etc. I will make some available in the downloads section of this website.
Music is a language. Becoming fluent requires curiosity, patience and bravery. Think of how babies learn to talk – they listen to adults, and they try without fear of being wrong. If we can create that environment for musicians, then they will flourish. This video from bass player Victor Wooten expresses this beautifully:
You can aid this curiosity by helping search out great performances, either on audio recordings, video (youtube – see my suggested youtube links) or taking your kids to concerts. I’ll let you know about worthy concerts from time to time, but the Melbourne Symphony Orchestra is always a great place to start.
RWPS Brass Band 